Here’s something no one warns you about after giving birth: you don’t become a mom—you disappear into motherhood. Your needs take a backseat. Your meals are whatever’s left over. Your sleep? What’s that? And slowly, without even realizing it, you stop being a person outside of being a mother. Let’s talk about maternal self-care—what it means, why it’s necessary, and how to reclaim it without the guilt.

Maternal Self-Care: Why Moms Need to Start Putting Themselves First

Everyone tells you to “sleep when the baby sleeps” (which is a joke, by the way), but no one tells you how to take care of yourself when you’re too drained to even think about self-care.

For many moms, self-care takes a backseat—and not in the first few weeks alone. Studies show that six months postpartum, more than 80% of women still haven’t resumed their usual self-care activities (Source: PMC, “The Role of Maternal Self-Care in New Motherhood”). That’s half a year of neglecting personal needs, pushing through exhaustion, and slowly losing yourself in the process.

The problem? When moms don’t take care of themselves, everything suffers—mental health,

Maternal Self-Care Is a Survival Skill

Here’s something shocking: Postpartum depression affects up to 20% of new mothers, yet many go undiagnosed because the focus is almost entirely on the baby (Source: World Health Organization). Maternal mental health is a thing to pay attention to in that period, as it impacts you and your child.

The International Journal of Nursing Studies found that postpartum care often focuses on physical health while completely neglecting emotional self-care needs. That means you could be physically recovering well but mentally drowning—without anyone noticing.

Maternal self-care isn’t about bubble baths and spa days. It’s about:

✔ Getting enough sleep (yes, it’s possible)

✔ Eating real meals instead of scraps

✔ Having time to breathe—literally (deep breathing lowers stress levels)

✔ Asking for help when you need it—and actually accepting it

✔ Reconnecting with yourself outside of motherhood

The hardest part? Many moms don’t feel like they “deserve” to take time for themselves. They fall into the trap of self-sacrifice, believing that being a “good mom” means putting themselves last. But you can’t pour from an empty cup—the better you take care of yourself, the better for your baby.

The Science of Self-Care: Why Your Well-Being Affects Everything

When moms experience sleep deprivation, lack of emotional support, and no time for self-care, it leads to:

• Increased stress and anxiety
• Higher rates of postpartum depression
• Weakened ability to manage daily motherhood challenges

According to a meta-analysis on maternal self-care, women who consistently practice self-care strategies report better overall well-being, stronger maternal functioning, and lower rates of postpartum depression.

Physical Self-Care: Your Body Needs You, Too

You wouldn’t expect a newborn to thrive on no sleep, junk food, and constant stress, right? So why do we expect moms to function under the same conditions? Taking care of your body is not a vanity thing—it’s a survival thing. Some key physical self-care strategies include:

✔ Rest as a priority– Sleep deprivation may lead to chronic stress, weakened immunity, and long-term health problems. Even if you can’t get eight hours, naps and quality rest help.

✔ Maintaining energy levels through a healthy diet – Skipping meals and surviving on coffee isn’t sustainable. Nourishing yourself properly helps your body heal and function, especially for new mothers who need to support breastfeeding and overall health.

✔ Getting movement back into your day – No, that doesn’t mean hitting the gym five days a week. Even a walk outside, gentle stretching, or a fitness class once a week could boost energy and improve mood.

How to Prioritize Self-Care (Without Feeling Guilty or Overwhelmed)

You probably already know that self-care is important, but it’s easier said than done. Here’s the thing: self-care isn’t about having extra time—it’s about making the time, even in small ways. Let’s break down how to fit self-care into your life.

1. Stop Waiting for “Free Time” (Because It’s Not Coming)

A big mistake new moms make? Thinking self-care will magically happen when there’s time. Spoiler: there’s never time. Many new mothers face challenges due to limited resources, including financial constraints and lack of social support, which makes it even harder to find time for self-care.

Instead of waiting, schedule it like a non-negotiable appointment. Even if it’s just:

• Five minutes of deep breathing in the morning
• A 10-minute walk while the baby naps
• Setting a hard boundary for 30 minutes of uninterrupted rest

The point? Self-care doesn’t have to be huge—it simply has to be consistent.

2. Build a Support System That Actually Helps

Moms were never meant to do things alone. In many cultures, family members, social support providers, healthcare providers, and even healthcare providers play a role in helping new mothers adjust.

🔹 Identify your go-to support people—whether it’s a partner, friend, or family member.

🔹 Use social support systems—whether online groups, local mom communities, or postpartum support programs.

🔹 Don’t be afraid to ask for help—your needs matter, too.

3. Reconnect With Your Own Needs (Outside of Motherhood)

It’s easy to lose yourself in early motherhood, but self-care means nurturing the parts of you that exist beyond being a mom. Maternal health practices, including prenatal care, good dietary habits, and social support are good for you.

Some self-care activities that get moms to reconnect with themselves:

✔ Writing in a journal (even if it’s only two sentences a day)

✔ Listening to a podcast that isn’t about parenting

✔ Spending time with people who make you feel like yourself again

✔ Doing something because it brings you joy (painting, music, reading, anything)

Self-Care Is How You Keep Going, So Don’t Stop

There’s no gold medal for burnout—but there is strength in knowing when to take care of yourself.

Start small. Five minutes of breathing. A real meal. One conversation that makes you feel seen. Incorporate self-care practices such as prioritizing rest, maintaining a balanced diet, and seeking social support. And remember: Taking care of yourself isn’t something extra—it’s the foundation that holds everything else together. 💛